


Polaroid Happiness

by CorMaris



Category: Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic
Genre: Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Dancing, Drama, Drunk Ja'far, Fluff, Hugs, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, In which Sinbad decides to stop before he gets ideas of ruining the world, M/M, Mentions of what happens in Sinbad no Bouken, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance, Sinja
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-05
Updated: 2018-02-28
Packaged: 2019-02-28 17:46:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13276668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CorMaris/pseuds/CorMaris
Summary: Sinbad has been having strange thoughts lately and these are encouraged by David. He's afraid of what he would do and so, in an attempt to escape from a possible future he fears, he decides to leave Sindria to find happiness. And with him, he brings Ja'far.Ja'far has noticed Sinbad's strange behaviour and is afraid that they're drifting apart. He has also noticed things about himself that he could never bring himself to love. Out of loyalty and love for his best friend, he decides to join him on his adventures.





	1. Chapter 1

_A Polaroid; The name of a brand but also a definition used for cameras that produce a picture a few seconds after having been taken._  
_Happiness; The state of being happy and content._  
_Polaroid happiness; Happiness which, once you have found what truly makes you happy, is instant and ever-lasting, like a polaroid picture._

What would you give for the sake of world order and power? And what would you give for the sake of giving it all up, for a more certain happiness and purpose in life?

Sinbad had lately found himself seriously pondering about these questions; about what he should do. A part of him demanded that he made a great name for himself - greater than the title of the High King of the Seven Seas and he knew that this was encouraged by David's voice edging him on in his head - while another craved true happiness. But it was all so strange, had he ever deserved something as abstract and absurd as true happiness? His naïve 12-year-old self had firmly believed in it but now 31 years old and not getting any younger, he was worried that he had given up himself in his pursuit of making the world a better place. Sometimes he caught himself nearly fearing himself and the way he reasoned recently; as if he was the one and only amazing being of this world, the only one capable of saving the human race and their egoistic way of thinking. Last time he had, he ended up as the slave as somebody else and was faced with the prospect of torture more times than he dared to count. Occasionally, he would agree to the idea of his own amazing capabilities while also presenting arguments as to why he wasn't; harbouring very conflicting emotions inside of his mind.

Perhaps it was about time to take a step back, before he hurt both himself and the rest of the world. The thought of that made him feel uneasy but it was also tempting, to finally try to find himself and not who he wanted himself to be. Sinbad could hear David loudly protesting in his mind and at this, he gave a slight smile. Of course David would never approve of such a thing, no matter how much Sinbad wanted it. Question was, for how long Sinbad would be able to withstand David's voice planting ideas in his ideas? According to David, his future was set in stone, for he was different from everyone else. He shouldn’t only blame his worry on David, as he feared the threat of him growing restless, being unable to directly influence the world as he had been able to for a great chunk of his life.

“I am destined for great things, huh?” he leaned back into his chair and folded his hands over his chest, his gaze traveling to the ceiling above his head. He stared intensely at the ceiling, which was painted white and as boring as usual, with no new interesting twists and surprises. Even so, he couldn’t make himself look away, as if his gaze was locked to it. Sinbad found himself thinking that he most likely wasn’t staring at the ceiling, either but through focusing his eyes on it he would gaze at his own ideas and thoughts.

“Talking to ourselves, are we, Sin?” the door to his study had been soundlessly opened and there stood Ja'far with a pile of papers most likely intended for Sinbad himself to look over. The tone Ja'far spoke in wasn't angry nor happy, almost empty and monotone; as if he was bored and simply carrying out his everyday chores. The king almost felt bad thinking about how he might’ve forced Ja'far into this life, a life the former assassin might’ve never enjoyed. Maybe he was unhappy, leading this kind of life with him?

Sinbad moved to look at the person standing in the door, his amber eyes observed him and memorised his appearance, despite being far from unfamiliar with it. The beautiful human with hair as white as snow, eyes as deep as the ocean and with perfect imperfections covering his face. He with the calming, soothing voice that caused Sinbad’s heart to flutter if he wasn’t careful enough.

Yes, the High King was capable of love, although his target of affection was inconvenient in this world and time. His best friend, the beautiful Ja'far. When had it come to this? Sinbad deeply and genuinely wished that he knew but he did not, although this had been going on for a while. He smiled and gently brushed a purple lock of hair behind his ear, though there was no need for him to. The king already looked stunning and that strand of hair had not bothered him nor covered his eyesight, it only happened to be convenient for that slightly nervous action when faced with his silly crush.

“Do you enjoy this, Ja'far? I mean; the endless paperwork, the difficult times and this place. What you do every single day..” Sinbad said, eyes observing Ja'far's elegant movements as he made his way over to his desk.

“I love Sindria and its citizens. Nothing can make me as happy as serving this kingdom and you as my king, unless it involved you actively doing your job rather than procrastinating, Sin.” Ja'far gave a small smile and placed the pile of papers before Sinbad on the desk, who made a displeased face at the seemingly artificial response from his advisor.

Sinbad groaned at the obvious hint before he continued; “Are you absolutely certain that there would be nothing else?” he watched him closely. “You don’t find this life.. Dull? With a lack of excitement and purpose?”

“Pardon?” Ja'far frowned at Sinbad and now seemed more interested in the conversation than he had prior to this. He watched him closely and placed a hand on his desk, waiting for his king and best friend to continue.

“I've been thinking..” Sinbad began, searching for his word as he spoke.

“About things other than work? Colour me surprised.” Ja'far said, every word reeking of sarcasm that most certainly was intended. Sinbad knew that it was coming, Ja'far couldn’t seem to help his sarcastic remarks when he was in that specific mood.

“Don't interrupt me.” the king said, frowning slightly.

“I apologise. I'll take this seriously.” Ja'far said before he sat down in a chair and watched his childhood friend closely, folding his hands neatly in his lap.

“Well, as I said, I've been thinking.. Of my current situation as the king of Sindria. It was my dream as a child, to change the world and become king. Now that I have achieved my goal, I don’t.. Feel as full-filled as I imagined.” Sinbad leaned back in his chair, watching his closest friend. “Nor as full-filled as I wanted to, I feel my life has grown.. meaningless.”

“Are you saying that you’re giving up? Is this an invitation for me to take your life?” Ja'far gave him a concerned look and crossed his arms over his chest. “You know what I said last time, Sinbad. And though it wouldn’t bring me joy, I am a man of my wo..”

Sinbad interrupted him before he could finish, quickly wanting to solve the little unfortunate misunderstanding. “No, it is not. Don’t get me wrong, Ja'far.” Sinbad gave a hearty sigh before he continued. “To give up, would be to stay here, where I feel as if I am.. Losing myself.” At this, Sinbad grimaced as he saw Ja'far's worried look.

“What are you saying?”

“That I need something else.. I am afraid, of what I will do if I continue down this path I created for myself. I need something new. I have lost so much in life; my father and mother, my friends and even my first kingdom. I don't want to lose myself as well, not the essence of who I am right now and I doubt I will be in the future. I am afraid Ja'far, of what I will do if I don’t stray away from this path.” Sinbad watched the younger male before averting his eyes.

“Sin, I..”

“Will you come with me? As cheesy as it sounds, I want to have my best friend by my side in my new pursuit of happiness.” he gave a small smile at the seemingly speechless Ja'far before him.

“I.. Will you give up and start whining, if things don’t turn out the way you wish for them to?”

At that, Sinbad smiled fondly at his friend. “For that reason, I need you with me. In case I do give up, I want my life to be taken by your hands.”

Ja'far appeared to hesitate for a few seconds as his gaze travelled to his own hands. He remained silent for what seemed like an eternity to Sinbad, who had recently poured his heart and feelings out, hoping for a positive response. Eventually, the white haired male looked up and met Sinbad’s gaze, giving him a small smile. “Alright. But I refuse to leave Sindria and our friends hanging, you must have a water-proof plan for me to agree to this. Unless Sindria’s safety and well-being is guaranteed, you and I will not be going anywhere.”

Sinbad smiled and nodded. “Of course.”

As dreamy as Sinbad’s new goal was, the only way to obtain it was through hard-work and a complex planning. Having become one of the most powerful personalities in the world, he couldn’t simply disappear and place his successor on the throne without tossing the world order into complete chaos; which would be against everything he had worked for up until now. No, his new purpose demanded long nights and early mornings, where he would constantly have to fight for his will and ignore the voice of David in his head. As tired as he was, he found himself able to carry on because he was quite excited about his future, which seemed more and more certain as time passed.

It was on a late night that he found himself feeling particularly emotional, a bit guilty, even. He was observing the beautiful Sindrian sunset from the window of his study and set aside his glass of wine, before rising from the comfort of his chair. With careful, almost hesitant steps he made his way over to the window for a better view of it.

Sunset was.. an incredibly poetic phenomenon and although Sinbad may be good with words, he felt that his ability was lacking when faced with the actual spectacle. Perhaps it was the wine, he might’ve had to much but he felt a sting of sorrow in his heart as he gazed upon the warm, colourful sky above his kingdom. Soon, he was to leave it all behind in the hands of Drakon and the remaining generals. Was he wrong to be leaving?

For his own sake, he knew it was right. This life could no longer satisfy him nor cause happiness to be a part of him and yet, the prospect of moving on from his childhood dream caused a bittersweet feeling to well up in his chest. David mocked him for his sentimentality but Sinbad simply smiled, mesmerised by the beautiful summer sky above and the sunset said its goodbyes to day, before transitioning into a stunning night with a starry sky.

“I thought you'd be in bed by now.” a voice suddenly said from the other side of the room. Sinbad already recognised the voice but turned his head to find Hinahoho standing there. He smiled at the giant man before moving back to his desk. He sat down on it and looked back to him, a smile playing across his lips.

“I had work to do and then I happened to witness the sunset, I couldn’t make myself look away from it.” Sinbad smiled and wrapped his hand around the glass of wine, before lifting it to his lips. This was an act that he was familiar with, perhaps a bit too familiar and he knew some would argue that he had issues. However, the king deemed his alcohol intake to be under control and was incapable of viewing himself as a possible alcoholic, even if he knew that some of his friends did. “Sometimes I wish goodbye had been easier, you know?”

Hinahoho frowned slightly but he soon smoothened his expression out. “You don’t happen to be drunk, Sinbad? What do you mean?”

He seemed to hesitate for a bit before answering, watching his reflection in the wine. Eventually, he let out a hearty sigh and his gaze moved back to Hinahoho's face. “I might be a little drunk.. Sorry, Hinahoho for bothering you. Please forget that I said such a strange thing, would you?”

Hinahoho shrugged before giving his king a smile. “You should probably lay off the wine, Sinbad.” He chuckled before he then continued. “It's clearly not doing much for you, only planting strange ideas and thoughts in your head.”

Hearing those words, Sinbad gave a weak smile. “You sound like Ja'far.. Ah, speaking of Ja’far, where is he?”

“He finished his work and went to the training grounds, I believe? Everyone else has went to bed and you should too, Sinbad.” Hinahoho smiled at his friend and then he turned to head out the door. “Anyway, I was just going to check up on you and my kids are waiting. I'll be going. Good night!”

“Of course. Good night, Hinahoho.”

Sinbad pondered about whether he should head for the training grounds or not to speak with Ja'far. He was clearly not feeling his best today, a bit melancholic even and the only one he could think of that he would want to share this with, was his best friend. However, Sinbad couldn’t deny that he was intoxicated and no human has been known to be smooth when speaking with others when they had consumed alcoholic, though naturally depending on the level of intoxication. Though, he had feelings for Ja'far and who knew what things he would tell him on a night he felt sentimental? His friendship with Ja'far was too dear to him to damage and so, he decided that he should speak with Ja'far when the effect of the alcohol had worn out. That and he deserved his time off. He gave a short nod and started to gather his things to head to bed but he soon found himself spacing out.

“I guess I'll go see Ja'far.”

Of course, this was the wine speaking and not Sinbad's own rationality, for it was dormant as a result of the alcohol.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Ja'far's POV. The walls between him and Sinbad are more visible than ever before. Even so, he wishes to go with him on his journey, despite the hardships they will face and he finds himself saying goodbye to family and friends sooner than he expected and prepared for.

It was strange, how Sinbad had suddenly decided to change his course of life. Ja'far had been shocked when he became aware of his unhappiness, which soon transitioned into what he would describe as feelings of guilt. Why hadn't he seen it? For the longest time, he had referred to Sinbad as his best friend and to not have seen what he was struggling with, meant he was a worthless friend and companion. Although he had already decided on the reason being that he was a worthless friend, he feared that the reason he hadn't seen was because Sinbad wouldn’t let him. Were they drifting apart? Was he losing the one person that meant the world to him, gave him the world?

He sighed and ran his fingers through his white locks of hair before looking around in the training grounds. The sun set a while ago, he had bore witness to the sunset while practicing his old techniques to assure that even though he may be bound to a study for the majority of his time, they wouldn’t grow rusty. Even if the reason behind his knowledge in such techniques was far from something beautiful, he still prided himself in his abilities to protect and kill without hesitation. It had come in handy now in later years for what he deemed to be a more noble reason and Ja'far had always had an itching need to be of use, especially after he joined Sinbad and his strange group of people back in the days. Because of this, he would do his very best to preserve his skills and therefore, he didn't dislike the late nights of restless training. In fact, they made him feel more at peace with himself at times.

“Ja'far, are you training this late at night?” said a voice from the castle halls that he recognised to be Hinahoho's. His gaze turned to watch him and he gave him a slight smile, correcting his posture before he decided to give him a proper answer.

“Good evening, Hinahoho. Yes, it makes me uneasy, thinking that my techniques could grow rusty unless I frequently put them to use. That is all, I plan to head to bed once I have finished. Are you going to sleep soon?” he smiled at him.

“Yes, I was on my way now, actually. But I have to check on the kids first.” he smiled. “I spoke with Sinbad earlier, he was drunk, just a warning in case you see him.”

It felt as if Ja’far sighed with his entire being, hearing those words he feared so much and yet was so familiar with. Of course Sinbad was drunk, he had become the type of man to cope with things accompanied by one, if not many, glasses of wine since he was a teenager. Even so, Ja'far continuously felt his heart ache at the sound of it, because every drop of wine was a second Sinbad could’ve spent talking with him about things that bothered him. Ja'far was losing his best friend to alcohol and he was consistently doing so. “I see.. Thank you for letting me know, Hinahoho.” Ja'far gave him a small smile, though forced and far from genuine.

“Don’t mention it.” Hinahoho turned to leave before he then looked back to Ja'far, giving him a smile. “Rurumu would’ve been proud, had she seen what you have become, Ja'far.”

...

Ah, of course. Rurumu. The woman who had treated him with a strict and gentle hand, raised him to be the man he was today. The woman who had embraced him and called him her first son. Yes, Ja'far viewed her as something along the lines of a mother, though it was difficult for him to admit due to the dark clouds known as his past lurking around him. He had loved her dearly and the mention of her name had the effect of making his body grow so cold and yet so warm, in a very uncomfortable but so familiar way. It was painful but one of his dearest memories. He missed her with all of his heart. But no, he couldn’t agree, Hinahoho couldn’t know; how much he failed the two that had acted as his parental figures once he joined Sinbad and the others. Ja'far didn’t want him to know either, the shame burning stronger than the strongest poison in his veins. So, he gave him a weak smile and said: “Thank you.” At this, Hinahoho smiled, the subject of Rurumu being all too rare due to the painful memories. They wished each other a good night and Ja'far watched the other’s frame disappear down the hall.

Ja'far's gaze lingered on the blades in his hands, the mention of Rurumu leaving a heavy feeling burning in his chest. It wasn’t only her either; everything came back to him when he heard her name, all the good things came to mind but with all the good things, came the memories that haunted him. He placed his hands on his chest, stroking the scaly surface through the cloth with the tips of his fingers before he closed his eyes and took a deep breath in a shaky attempt to calm himself down. Unfortunately, it didn’t work as well as he would’ve wished for it to and he found himself thinking that he might not fall asleep tonight. And to provide further distraction, he practiced his abilities in the training grounds to the point of exhaustion. As time passed, he could feel that somebody’s eyes were focused on him and he looked over his shoulder, his king and best friend coming into view.

“Hinahoho told me that you’d be here, Ja'far.” Sinbad gave him such a beautiful smile, despite being intoxicated. There he stood and he leaned against one of the pillars, managing to look breath-taking despite the casual position. He was beautiful. It was unfair. “You seem upset, is there something bothering you?”

Ja'far smiled and wrapped his robes back around his body before walking up to Sinbad. Though he was exhausted, this was suppressed in his walk and expression, one could not tell that he had been training his body a lot that evening. “You're imagining things, Sin. It's the wine.”

Sinbad blinked his eyes at the comment before he connected a few dots in his eyes, giving his friend a charming smile. “You must have spoken to Hinahoho. It was only one or two glasses of wine.” He reached a hand out, to brush one of Ja'far's white locks behind his ear but the shorter male moved out of reach. At this, the hand stooped in clear surprise, even if Ja'far was still easily within his reach, Sinbad immediately respected the distance.

“I did. But you also reek of alcohol, it doesn’t take a lot to understand that you’re drunk.” Ja'far watched him and he saw the obvious disappointment in his eyes, understanding that it was caused by him moving away from his touch. He despised alcohol and what it did to his friend and because of that, he refused to let Sinbad touch him when he was intoxicated. When his king and friend was drunk, the wine was in control and not his actual self and this, Ja'far disliked very much. “I'll escort you to your room. Come on, let's go.”

He felt Sinbad's eyes linger on his back as he walked down the hall and the moment he found himself thinking he might not follow along, he heard heavy steps slowly draw closer to him. Purposely, he slowed down his own pace and soon Sinbad was next to him, though they were both silent. The mood had dropped drastically since Ja'far moved away from his king’s hand, showing the great wall there was between them. Maybe he was the main problem in this issue? At that thought, Ja'far grimaced and shook his head to rid him of it, knowing all too well that Sinbad could read him like an open book, most of the time.

“A part of me will miss this..” Sinbad mused, his eyes observing each detail of the castle as if it was the first time he saw it, or the last. He seemed troubled, which Ja'far was already well aware of that he was but he also knew that Sinbad hadn’t been completely honest with him, when it came to the things that bothered him. He was very secretive, that man and as soon as Ja'far believed he had opened himself up for Ja'far to freely read the writings on the papers, he would close himself again and hide among the books of the library. It was an endless, tiresome chase that Ja'far would not willingly get himself out of until he had been able to catch what he desperately hunted for.

“Of course,” Ja'far said before he continued. “This is our home, the rebuilding of the first kingdom and the thing you have worked so hard for. It is not something you will be able to let go off so easily, even if it makes you unhappy. Even so, Sin. The wine has made you awfully sentimental tonight.”

Sinbad sighed and drooped his shoulders. “It's not the wine, Ja'far.. You surely don’t like that I drink. I felt this way before I drank, too. All the alcohol is doing is putting words to my emotions. That's all.” His tone of voice was tired, as if he had been driven to the point of exhaustion while he protected himself with a shield in an endless battle. It made Ja'far shiver, how empty the voice had been and a part of him felt guilt quickly fill his whole being.

Ja'far watched him with concerned eyes before they eventually arrived at Sinbad’s bed chambers. The former assassin assured himself that nothing was out of order before he turned to Sinbad, giving him a small bow. “Good night, my king.” His soul felt a small, throbbing pain at how he had addressed his best friend. He would always, always call him “Sin”, it brought warmth to his heart and hopefully, to Sinbad’s too. However, right now, he had called him “his king”, like any unimportant and distant subordinate would. It hurt him and he desperately tried to understand the reason behind him being this distant. Was he angry?

At the cold way of addressing the man, the beautiful amber eyes of Sinbad's adopted a more pained look, which caused the advisor's heart to ache a little bit more in his chest. “Sin is fine. Good night, Ja'far.” He said before he entered his bed chambers and closed the door behind himself. It happened in a heartbeat, before Ja'far had the chance to correct himself, the door behind him slammed shut.

_Ah. Good night, Sin._

Ja'far watched the door in silence and carefully placed his pale hand against its surface, now more aware than ever of the wall between them that he for some reason actively persisted on showing to his best friend. He wanted to destroy it but all he did was build it higher and higher, until he could no longer see the end of it. How stupid and despicable he was, to commit such a horrible deed against the man that meant the world to him. What pained him the most was the fact that Sinbad had seemed as if he wanted to tell him something; far from the small thing he had told him before. Ja'far couldn't shake that feeling and knowing how he had so easily pushed him away, as if he was scared of finding out, Ja'far couldn't help but feel disgusted with himself and his own existence. Why was he so afraid of hearing what troubled him? How could he ever call himself Sinbad's best friend again?

Ja'far felt absurdly cold, that warm summer night in the kingdom of Sindria.

He awoke the following morning, a burning sensation in his skin that reminded him of the weakness he had shown once he hid behind doors. The young man rose from bed and dressed in his dearest belonging; the Sindrian attire. He barely spared himself a glance in the mirror as he wrapped his weapons around his bandage clad arms and headed out of his room, to start his usual morning routine. It was early and as always, he hoped to get as much work as possible done. Everyone referred to him as a workaholic and Ja'far could only agree, he had to be that self-aware, at the very least. He had been a hard-worker, not since the very beginning but after Rurumu's teachings which he held close to his heart. Ja’far had a burning need to be of use, to be helpful to others and especially, to Sinbad whose dream was so bright it nearly blinded him. Some would call him passionate and ambitious, while he knew it wasn’t the whole truth. He was a prisoner to his own emotions and memories, to those who he had lost because he wasn’t stronger. As long as he was reliable and loyal, of use to those around him, he felt a little at peace. Even so, to protect Sinbad from the pain of becoming somebody he hated, Ja'far would do anything.

After all, he was a monster.

A few hours passed and Ja'far went to Sinbad's study, to see if he had already gotten up. As expected, it was empty and Ja'far continued down the hall, arriving outside of his king's room. With a short knock on the door, he opened it and found him in the process of getting dressed. Ja’far had already seen Sinbad's naked skin a couple of times and as a result of this, embarrassment was far away at the sight of Sinbad's body this late morning.

“Good morning, Sin. I see you’re already up. Breakfast has been prepared for you and there is some paperwork waiting for you on your desk.” Ja’far smiled and folded his arms over his chest, watching his friend closely.

“Thank you, Ja'far.” Sinbad said, without sparing Ja'far a single glance.

..Was he angry? Of course he was, Ja'far had rejected his touch and denied him the right to say what he had on his heart. He had behaved awfully towards the person he claimed to be his best friend. It was only natural, that he was angry and Ja'far pondered about whether or not he would make things worse with an apology..

“About yesterday,” Sinbad began and Ja’far lifted his gaze, inspecting the man before him with confusion. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come bother you when I was drunk.”

Ja'far was at a loss of words for a bit, surprised by the fact that Sinbad took the imitative to apologise. Of course, this doesn’t mean that Ja'far viewed Sinbad to be a spoiled, arrogant brat. No, all there was to it was that Ja'far believed himself to have acted coldly for no particular reason and he still did. “You.. have nothing to apologise for. I am very sorry for behaving so coldly yesterday, Sin. You seemed as if you wanted to tell me something and I pushed you away. If there is anything you wish to tell me, I am all ears.”

Sinbad smiled at Ja'far but the younger male wasn't able to tell whether this meant he intended to tell him or not. “Thank you, Ja'far.”

_Ah, he wouldn't._

“Of course. I'll give you some privacy.” Ja'far took a step back and left out the door. The disappointment was quite obvious in the way as he carried himself when he silently walked down the corridor. A part of him laughed at the pitiful performance that had previously taken place; Ja'far had wished to mend the broken bridges but his attempts were never met, which he could understand perfectly well. Another part of him wanted to shed tears like an infant and seek comfort in the embrace of somebody who was no longer in this world. What a pitiful display he was.

The day continued as the negative thoughts raged on inside of the head of the advisor of Sindria. Despite this, he had matters to tend to and those were far more important than the insignificant state of his well-being. After all, nothing was more important to him than the happiness and well-being of Sinbad and Sindria and in order to preserve it, he didn't care how hard he had to work. As long as he was of use and Sinbad greeted him with a smile, he could handle the exhaustion and stress caused by overwork.

He was only a human after all, one with hopelessly complicated emotions.

Ja'far realised that time was such a funny thing; when he wanted the time to pass by fast due to excitement, he would be painfully aware of every slow second passing by and when he wished that a time would never come, it was there before he even dared look around the corner. When both excitement and dread had decided to join hands, the time passed by in an odd manner. He was strangely aware of every, fast second that passed by and soon, he found himself standing before the generals and Sindria's newly crowned king, next to the strangely ordinary prodigy.

Yamuraiha shed tears and gave them each a tight and uncomfortable hug. Pisti fought against the tears behind her eyelids and hugged both of them, exclaiming that they must return soon. Hinahoho smiled and encouraged them to enjoy themselves but to stray away from stupid actions, most likely intended for Sinbad. Kikiriku and his siblings were visibly upset and begged them both not to leave. Drakon seemed to feel a little bit uncomfortable with his new position but was happy to see them leave on a new journey. Saher was mainly excited, asking them to take care of each other and enjoy their time. Spartos smiled and wished them well. Sharrkan grinned and told them to enjoy their time. Masrur, he was silent.

Ja'far watched as Yamuraiha handed Sinbad a magic tool and did her best to convince him to use it to speak with them at least weekly. Sharrkan laughed at her for being emotional about their departure, much to the poor woman's dismay and Ja'far found himself smiling at the display. He thought it was cute and he knew that he would miss them, they had all become very dear to him; like family or close friends. Ja’far knew that leaving home would feel strange but perhaps, he would be able to find a second home somewhere in the world. When Sinbad went for the ship, he started to follow but felt a lingering gaze on the back of his head and turned around, only to see a tall Fanalis towering above him. It was none other than Masrur, who seemed sad about them leaving.

“..Goodbye, Masrur.” Ja'far smiled at the Fanalis before him. The two had always shared a special bond that one would compare to the bonds close siblings shared. After all, the two had been raised and basically adopted by the same man and woman; it was inevitable that Masrur had become so dear to him. They didn't need words to communicate but sometimes, Ja'far would make for small talk with the other man.

“Take care. And look after Sinbad and yourself.” The Fanalis watched him, he didn’t want him to leave and Ja'far could tell as much.

“I will miss you.” Ja'far said. The statement was a bit awkward, though clear and the two had always been aware of the affection they felt for each other but it had always been something unspoken.

“Yeah..”

Ja'far smiled at Masrur. “I'll be off then.”

“Ja'far.”

“Yes?”

“..I hope you'll be happy. Come back home someday.”

Those words caused a warm feeling to rise in Ja'far's chest. A burning sensation of affection for the man that was like his brother, his family and friend raged on inside him of. He would miss them and this life but even so, this little adventure might be worth something in the end. And if all else failed; he and Sinbad both had a home to return to. Because of this knowledge, he was able to smile fondly at Masrur.

“Yes.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written from Sinbad's POV. Sinbad and Ja'far arrive in Reim! With David constantly reminding Sinbad of his flaws, what will he do?

Their first destination was Reim, Sinbad had made up his mind about that long ago. Why he chose Reim, he wasn't exactly sure of but he knew that he wished to visit all the places he had been to before together with Ja'far once again. Perhaps, those places would spark lost memories and feelings and while it was a far-fetched thought, it was one that he had put all of his hopes in. His body was filled with such excitement that he found himself unable to sleep, despite having tried for hours so far. He rested his hands on his stomach and closed his eyes, counting the seconds and hoping to fall asleep.

1... 2... 3... 4... 5... Ah, this certainly wasn't his cup of tea. He sighed and once again that night, his eyes opened. Sinbad soon found himself staring at the wall separating his room from Ja'far’s and he wondered if the other man has fallen asleep yet. If he was awake, they could spend the dark and boring hours of the night together, rather than alone.

_Bored already, are we, Sinbad?_

The former king scoffed and rolled over on his side as he placed his pillow over his head. Naturally, this would not block out the voice of David but he certainly didn't feel like getting mocked for his will, especially not now when he was feeling so excited about it. He didn't want anyone to ruin the nice feeling that resided in his chest.

_Stop being ridiculous. You’re not cut out for this. Your ego demands you to be in control of everything. Sooner or later, you will return to a life similar to the one you just led._

Sinbad groaned at the sound of David's voice and his mood had already started to drop, much to his dismay. This feeling had been very dear to him and the fact that it was so easily tainted, annoyed him more than he imagined that it would.

_Eventually, you'll realise that I’m speaking the truth._

“Please just shut up for tonight!” Sinbad said in a determined tone with the lowest volume he could possibly muster when he was annoyed. He could hear David's low chuckle but shortly after that, his voice tuned out and Sinbad let out a sigh in relief. Sometimes, he handled it far better but for today, which had been going so well, he truly didn’t wish to speak with David. He wanted to have a perfect day for once but it seemed as if he would have to wait a little bit longer for that. Sinbad curled up under the covers to enjoy the warmth and the silence that engulfed his cabin.

However, it didn't remain quiet for long as he soon heard stirring in the room next to his and then shortly after footsteps could be heard that drew closer to his door. Sinbad cursed in his mind at that, since he truly didn’t wish to explain his sudden angry outburst to his concerned best friend. Perhaps he would one day but right now didn't feel like the time that he should. He turned around in his bed and gazed over at the door, in case he was to enter.

“Sin, are you alright?” the former general of Sindria spoke with a drowsy voice. The sound of it made Sinbad's heart skip a beat but he shortly after managed to compose himself. This was no time to be lovesick.

“I'm fine, Ja'far!” Sinbad sighed and he dropped his head back down on his pillow. He ran his fingers through his hair as he thought of what to say next in order to convince Ja'far not to barge in through the door to his cabin. “I had a bad dream and woke up, that's all.”

The door handle rustled slightly but it soon stopped. A silence fell over the ship and Sinbad could barely even hear the wooden ship creak. It made him feel uncomfortable. Even the man at the other end of the door was silent, as if the whole world had fallen asleep in front of Sinbad's feet. However, movement could soon be heard again and Ja'far finally spoke with that beautiful voice of his that Sinbad genuinely believed that he could listen to all day. “Well then, good night, Sin.”

While Sinbad felt guilty for keeping secrets from his best friend, he felt relieved that he didn't have to go through everything tonight. A small smile formed on his lips and he turned to look towards the door, as if he would be able to see through it and watch the man behind it. “Good night, Ja'far.”

Sinbad knew that Ja'far didn't move from his door for a while because it wasn't until a couple of minutes later that he could finally hear the rustling of sheets in the other room. It was obvious just how worried Ja'far was about him and it troubled Sinbad greatly, because the other man meant so much to him and the thought of worrying him like that, stung in its own special way.

He slowly edged closer to the wall and put his ear up against it. Sinbad listened after the gentle breathing of his best friend but couldn’t hear it. Ja'far had never been a loud sleeper, which Sinbad had become aware of when they slept in the same bed as children. The only time he made much of a noise was when he had nightmares, a sight that had always caused a difficult and suffocating feeling to well up in Sinbad’s chest. He hated whenever Ja'far was in pain, most likely caused by his past as an assassin and Sinbad has never been able to figure out just what he should do in those situations. Whenever it had happened, he had stroked his hair and prayed for the nightmares to pass.

“Ja'far..” a whisper left Sinbad's lips as he closed his eyes and attempted to fall asleep.

“Sin?” was the reply that came from the other room. Sinbad was shocked, he knew that Ja'far had exceptionally good hearing for a normal human and that the walls were near paper thin but really, he thought he whispered in a lower tone of voice than that.

“Ah.. I wanted to check whether you had fallen asleep or not.” Sinbad said, suddenly feeling embarrassed at the fact that he was caught whispering the name of his best friend.

“..Was that it?” when Ja’far received a humming sound from the other end, he continued. “Are you sure that you’re alright?”

“I'm sure! Good night, Ja'far!” Sinbad rolled over on his other side in embarrassment. His face felt hot and it was uncomfortable.

“..Good night, Sin.” It was the last thing Sinbad could remember before falling asleep.

Days passed by quickly after that and before Sinbad knew, they had arrived in Reim. The impressive country could be seen from the ship and it was an amazing sight for the man that tried to achieve his dream. He felt quite excited when he saw land and quickly went to inform his best friend. His steps were fast and pounded against the wooden floor as he went to search for Ja'far.

“Ja'far! We’ve arrived!” his voice nearly sang the words and if that didn't show how excited he was, Sinbad didn't know what would.

Ja'far emerged from below deck and he looked to him, the light breeze taking control of his white locks of hair. “We're finally here?”

Sinbad could barely contain himself and nodded furiously in response before he opened his mouth to speak. “We are! Let's pack! Hurry!”

“You're like an excited child..” Ja'far sighed as if annoyed but Sinbad could see the pretty smile on his lips that seemingly tried to hide from his eyes.

Sinbad groaned at the comment on his behaviour and he watched him. “Quit it with the insults! Just hurry up!”

“Alright..”

He was happy, unbelievably so at the sight of Reim because now his goal felt more in reach than ever before; though it may be very abstract. Sinbad had thought that if he visited some of the many places he had been to during the time of his youth, he would be able to find himself again somehow. He hadn't told Ja'far about that but he believed that he had been able to figure it out on his own.

The first thing the pair did when leaving the ship was to search for a suitable inn. They had brought quite a lot of money with them during their trip but even so, picking a fancy inn simply because they could was out of the question for Sinbad. He had demanded that they picked an inn more suitable for the middle class, smiling brightly once they found one. It wasn't pretty but neither was it ugly and in Sinbad's mind; it was perfect.

Ja'far, paranoid as usual, searched through the room to assure himself that there were no intruders before turning to Sinbad. His intense eyes observed the man in front of him and Sinbad felt himself feeling a bit uncomfortable at that, it felt as if Ja'far could see right through him with his piercing gaze. It didn't remain that way for long, as Ja'far soon spoke.

“So? What do you intend to do?” was what he said, as he watched his best friend. It was a very simple question that was more difficult to answer than Sinbad had previously anticipated.

“Huh?”

Ja'far furrowed his brow at Sinbad's confused expression. “In Reim? Why did you take us here?”

“Ah.. I intend to go on small adventures and maybe find some smaller jobs here and there.” he smiled at his best friend. Sinbad lifted a hand and pulled his bangs back as he watched him. It was a slightly nervous action and for what reason, he did not understand.

“And what exactly do you mean by ‘small adventures'?” Ja'far crossed his arms over his chest and he watched him.

“Making things up as I go. I don't want to have every little small detail organised. I want to see where life takes me.” Sinbad smiled once again.

“Sin..” Ja'far watched him with concerned eyes, there was clearly something that he wanted to say. _Don't you dare say it_ were the words that raged on inside of his head. He didn't want to hear that he would constantly strive for control. For once, he didn't want to and that David had already reminded him of it put him on edge and made him feel agitated. It seemed as if Ja’far understood it because he fell silent and while Sinbad knew that he shouldn't run away from it, it made him feel relieved.

Sinbad smiled and patted him on the shoulder. “Let's split up and find different things to do today. After that, we can meet up in the evening and take a walk through the market?”

“Alright, I will see you later.”

Sinbad smiled and as the two parted ways, he found himself watching Ja'far's frame disappear down the street. When he caught himself staring, he felt a blush creep up his cheeks and he turned on his heel to head for the harbour. He was strong and productive when it came to physical labour and he had always loved the sea, so it felt like the best way to spend his first day in Reim there.

Work at the harbour was rough but Sinbad loved it. For once, what he had to put to use was his own body rather than his mind as he looked through a pile of papers. While many had disregarded his lack of interest in paperwork as him being lazy, they were wrong. Sinbad couldn’t deny that he sometimes was the very definition of a procrastinator, he truly hated paperwork. He couldn't see the change happen with his own eyes and he was forced to watch it on a paper. A white piece of paper with words scribbled on them in ink told him nothing, it might as well be an illusion and it made Sinbad feel uneasy. He didn't trust easily. Because of this, it felt nice to be able to watch the change happen before his eyes; though it was small and didn't mean much to the rest of the world. The entire day was spent like that for Sinbad as he helped the people around that were unaware of his previous position as the high king of the seven seas.

As he went back to the inn later that same day, he found himself to be in an exceptionally good mood. He hummed a small melody to himself as he made his way back. Once he arrived, he opened the door and went inside of the room.

“Ja'far, I’m back!”

He heard a humming sound from their room before Ja'far then poked his head out from behind the corner. “Welcome back. How did it go?”

“It went well! I worked at the harbour and helped ships load and unload their cargo. What were you up to?” Sinbad smiled at him and went over to him, placing the money he had earned during the day on a small table that was next to an open window.

“I helped a jewellery shop guard their merchandise.” Ja'far said. He was leaning against the wall as he sat on his bed and he tended to his skin. Sinbad could see that he had burned his left arm but he didn't comment on it and he smiled at his best friend.

“Oh? So you already went to the market?” is what he said instead as he then sat down on the table he had placed the money on.

“Mhm.” Was the simple answer he received, Ja'far didn't even look up as he gave him that reply.

“Great! Then you can show us the way there later. But I need to take a bath first!” Sinbad smiled before he went to wash himself off, feeling Ja'far’s eyes burn into his back. The other man didn't reply but since he didn't retort, Sinbad assumed that he would be fine with it and didn't pay it much mind.

He spent about half an hour to wash himself off before he got dressed in simple robes he had brought with him from Sindria. Sinbad put his hair up in a ponytail before he then glanced into the mirror. He caught himself considering getting a haircut before he then smiled and turned to look at his best friend.

“Shall we go then?”

Together, they went to the market which was close-by the inn that they had decided to stay in. Sinbad vaguely knew the way there but since Ja'far had recently went there, he was the one to show them the way as his memory of it had been freshened. As they arrived there, they were met with the smell of food, drinks, the image of colourful items and people. It had become relatively dark already and because of this, many of the stands had decided to pack down for the day but some still remained.

“The market is beautiful!” Sinbad exclaimed in excitement as he looked around together with Ja'far.

While he had seen it before, he had actually been quite familiar with it in the past, it felt as if he looked upon it with a pair of new eyes in that very moment. It wasn’t as crowded as it had been during the day and the people present had most certainly changed. Now, the streets were filled with intoxicated men, women with a less desirable profession and gamblers, among others. However, Sinbad still enjoyed it very much and he felt safe, as he had Ja'far next to him, who was very capable of handling any occasional surprise attacks that might occur.

Sinbad looked at all of the stands that sold pretty jewellery and clothes. After all, he had grown used to a lifestyle where he could wear pretty and expensive things and while he wasn't above wearing less high quality items, Sinbad would always be a vain man and he enjoyed to be dressed in pretty things. Ja'far laughed a little at the sight and while it would’ve embarrassed him in the past, he simply smiled at him as he continued to observe different clothes with intricate patterns.

“Would I look good in this robe?” Sinbad smiled and pointed to a purple robe with golden embroidery, which Ja'far took a second or two to evaluate.

“Would be too much purple.” Ja'far glanced back to his friend and he watched him.

“Ah, you're probably right..” Sinbad said in a defeated tone and the two friends left the booths as they continued down the market.

Sinbad tried to convince Ja'far to tell him if he wanted something but the man simply groaned at him after a while and told him to stop nagging. At that, Sinbad pouted but he decided to cheer up as soon as he felt that his mood had started to drop. The market was as beautiful during the night as it was during the day but it most certainly was different. Along the booths that dared stay up so late, torches had been lit and some occasional food stands would usher the two friends to come try their dishes. Sinbad bought them two buns with vegetable and meat fillings and he caught a small smile on Ja'far's lips as he ate his. It caused a familiar and warm feeling of affection to well up into his chest and he smiled to himself as the two continued down the market.

It felt like a dream, to be able to spend this time with Ja'far.

His eyes eventually landed on a bar and he gently grabbed a hold of Ja'far's wrist. “Come on, let's go for a drink!”

“Ah but Sin- I don't drink!” Ja'far tried to protest and he looked from the bar and back to his best friend. His brow was furrowed and it was actually quite cute. Ja'far was a very careful man and Sinbad knew that he normally despised drinking but for one night, he wanted to enjoy a glass with his best friend.

“Just one glass should be fine? Please, Ja'far? It's fine for you to let loose every once in a while. And there is some nice music playing over there!” Sinbad smiled in an attempt to convince Ja'far that it would be fine and as it seemed to work, he smiled widely.

“..Alright but just one glass.”

“Thank you! This is the first time just you and I are going out for drinks together. I'm happy.” Sinbad smiled at him and with Ja'far in tow, they entered the bar.

  
Ja'far was not a good drunk. Absolutely adorable but all over the place. It certainly kept his own alcohol intake at a low though, maybe he should take Ja’far with him to drink all the time. Because now he was busy keeping an eye on his drunk best friend instead. Sinbad smiled at the sight before he placed his large wooden cup on the table. He watched the white-haired male closely before he inhaled deeply and gave him the most charming smile that he could muster. Slowly, he extended his right hand to him and he watched as Ja’far lifted his gaze and looked up at him. It almost made his heart skip a beat at how innocent the younger man looked in that very moment. He wanted to protect and hold but he would settle for some fun, instead. “Ja'far, dance with me?”

“Huh? But I can’t dance!” Ja'far’s hand tightly clutched his own cup as he watched his best friend with a confused look in his eyes.

“It's fine, I'll teach you.” Sinbad smiled and grabbed a hold of Ja'far's hands and pulled his stumbling best friend up from his chair. Drunk Ja'far wasn't good at dancing either but he was cute and that was all that mattered to Sinbad. That and them enjoying themselves and Ja'far smiled so beautifully that it almost made Sinbad's heart ache at how gorgeous he was.

Ja'far stepped on his feet a couple of times and Sinbad didn’t know why he was surprised at that. Because even if Ja’far was insanely talented at assassination techniques and had great control of his body, he too was a human and would execute some things poorly and stumble when drunk. Somehow, it made him realise that he might’ve misunderstood Ja'far and who he was sometimes. While the thought alone hurt, he was quite happy to have discovered another part of his best friend that he didn’t already know. A part of him claimed that Ja'far too was unaware of all the different sides to him. He was such a beautifully colourful person and Sinbad loved it.

He loved it, he loved him, to the extent that it hurt.

By the time they went home, Ja'far could barely even walk straight while Sinbad was as sober as could be as a result of having been too busy keeping an eye on the younger man. Sinbad smiled at his best friend’s clumsy walk and slowly picked him up on his back as he carried him from the bar. Ja'far giggled softly, a sound that seemed to melt into Sinbad's ears and he sang incoherent words by his ear. The melody was without a doubt off-key but it was cute, somehow. While caring for somebody that had basically turned into a child would annoy many, it made Sinbad happy to see how much Ja’far had relaxed around him and even on their first night in Reim. Somehow, it made him feel like the distance between them was slowly disappearing because of how close they were right now and it gave him some comfort.

After they had walked for a while, Ja'far smiled and rested his head against his shoulder. He suddenly spoke words that surprised the man with the long purple hair. His voice as soft as silk. “Sin, you’re amazing!”

Sinbad was surprised at the sudden declaration of admiration. His head slowly turned to look over his shoulder and he gazed at Ja'far. “Eh? Not that I mind the praise but coming from you out of the blue, it's a bit worrisome..” he smiled at his best friend before he turned his attention back to the street. Not many were out and walking anymore like they had been prior to their bar visit, the people had most likely went to bars, casinos or even surrendered to sleep.

“I think you’re amazing! I’m scared you'll forget about me! You know, I'm just like a shadow and you keep shouldering responsibilities that aren’t yours to begin with..” that’s at least what Sinbad thought he heard him say because by now, Ja'far's speech slurred and was quite difficult to understand.

He blinked his eyes in confusion. Forget about him? That would never happen. Ja'far was one of the most amazing people he had met and Sinbad didn’t want to begin to imagine a life without him by his side. “Don't be silly.. I'd never forget about you! No matter what I will do in the future, I will always remember you, Ja'far.”

Ja'far gave him a beautiful, drunken smile and he brushed his lips against Sinbad's cheek. Or, Sinbad wasn’t sure if his own lovesick mind was imagining things or if that actually was a peck on the cheek. It might've been a way for Ja'far to say thank you but this had never been a thing that the two did with each other. A part of Sinbad hoped that it meant Ja'far harboured feelings of the same sort as him but he was scared of getting his hopes up, only for them to crash. After all, Ja'far was drunk and intoxicated people weren't always the most graceful around. He felt his cheeks quickly heat up, despite his attempts to not interpret the peck on the cheek as a declaration of love. Sinbad desperately didn’t wish to act like some hopeless teenager in love.

“Ah, your face is red.” Were the words that Ja'far suddenly said, that Sinbad never wished to hear. He had hoped that Ja'far hadn’t been able to see it but much to the former king's dismay, he most certainly could.

“It is not!” Was the most dignified answer that Sinbad could muster in a time of crisis when his embarrassment had reached quite high levels. On second thought, it wasn’t one of his most graceful attempts at handling a situation but he decided that it would have to make do when he tried to handle a drunk Ja'far.

At that, the intoxicated man hummed a little as he lifted his head from the other's shoulder and gazed at him with unfocused eyes. “Don’t try to get out of this! You look like a tomato.” Ja’far said as he let his index finger repeatedly poke Sinbad's cheek.

“You're such a bad drunk!” Sinbad admitted defeat and he sighed as he adjusted the hold on his best friend to make sure he wouldn’t slip off of his back.

At that, Ja'far heartily laughed by his ear and his head dropped back down on Sinbad's shoulder again. The other man continued his walk with his best friend on his back. He lifted his head and gazed up at the night sky with amber eyes. Today had been a good day and Sinbad felt refreshed after everything he had been through and seen.

_Soon this life won't satisfy you anymore, Sinbad. You'll never be satisfied._

Sinbad heard David's voice echo inside of his head and he lowered his gaze. His eyes closed briefly and he sighed softly.

I know, is what he thought to himself.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ja'far's POV. They spend their last week in Reim and the distance between them becomes apparent once again.

Ja'far suddenly woke in the early morning. His breath was heavy and his heart pounded uncomfortably in his chest. He had woken up from a nightmare and his thoughts screamed in his head to the point that it brought him near unbearable pain. His bewildered gaze moved from the ceiling above his head to his best friend on the other side of the rented room at the inn. When he assured himself that he was fine, he lifted his hands and inspected them closely. They trembled but other than that they were clean and pale, with no crimson red staining them and Ja'far took a deep breath to calm down. He often experienced nightmares that were inspired by his past as an assassin. While he claimed to have come to terms with it, the guilt caused by the act of killing innocent people never completely vanished from the back of one's mind.

  
Yesterday before they had gone to bed, they had agreed not to work. This was because Sinbad wanted them to enjoy the last week in Reim and experience the country's culture differently than they had up until now. Next week, the two had made the decision to travel to Artemyra. Ja’far didn't mind the idea and had easily accepted his plans. However, Sinbad was still asleep and Ja'far watched him as he slept in the other bed. While he toyed with the idea of trying to fall back asleep, Ja'far knew that he wouldn’t be able to and he sighed as his gaze travelled to the ceiling above his head once more.

He did try to remain patient as he waited for Sinbad to wake up but he soon found himself to be unable to wait for much longer. Ja’far felt restless and he needed to move. To occupy himself with something, he decided to head out and get them breakfast to surprise Sinbad with it before he woke up. While the warmth underneath the covers was quite comfortable compared to the chilly air that enveloped the room, Ja'far soon left his bed. He dressed himself in simple, loose, brown pants and a white blouse with long sleeves. In order to protect his skin as well as possible from the sun, Ja'far wore a hooded coat to avoid unnecessary and painful sunburns before he eventually went outside.

They had been in Reim for about three weeks now. Ja'far wasn't sure what exactly it was that Sinbad was searching for and he could tell that Sinbad didn’t really know either. It made things difficult but Ja’far had grown to accept it for now, since they still followed a solid plan but it didn't help ease his worry for the mental health of his best friend. Ja'far carefully pushed the door open and took a deep breath to fill his lungs with the fresh morning air. It was still quite early and not many had gotten up yet, except for those that were dependent on the morning rush of the harbour city.

Since the market was nearby, it didn't take very long for him to get there. In total, he was only gone for about 20 minutes. Ja'far admitted that it might’ve been a little more or a little less than that but he calculated in his mind that it had been an approximately 20 minutes absence. Once Ja'far arrived back at the inn, Sinbad had woken up and Ja'far smiled when he noticed. He didn't expect to find his friend awake but despite his expectations, it was a pleasant surprise to have somebody to talk to.

“Good morning, Sin. Have I kept you waiting?” Ja'far said as he removed his coat and folded it neatly on the bed. He placed the basket with their food on the small table by the window before he turned to his best friend.

“Good morning..” Sinbad said with a drowsy voice before he then continued. “Not at all. I just woke up. Were you out getting us breakfast?”

“Yes. I woke up early and grew bored waiting for you, so I went on ahead. I hope that’s fine?” Ja'far smiled at him.

“I would’ve liked to have gone with.. But it’s alright. Let's eat.” Said Sinbad as he then got up and dressed himself in simple robes. Ja’far wouldn't so easily like to admit that he watched him as he got dressed but he did. It was a habit to pick Sinbad’s clothes out for him and dress him and now that he was no longer royalty, he dressed in such simple robes. However, Ja'far genuinely liked to see Sinbad in such simple clothing, he carried it with both pride and dignity and it was beautiful.

They sat down and shared breakfast together. While they would occasionally make for small talk, it was mostly spent in silence. This worried Ja'far to a certain degree but he convinced himself that words weren’t needed between the two all the time. The silence didn’t suffocate him and he hoped that was the case for Sinbad as well. If it wasn't, he would only worry more and the thought of it caused to force himself to withhold a sigh.

Once they had finished breakfast, Sinbad and Ja'far got ready to head out for a bit. They dressed accordingly to the sunny weather outside and left their room at the inn behind them.

Sinbad smiled widely at Ja'far, who watched him for a couple of seconds before he then spoke. “So, where are we headed?” Sinbad had refused to tell him for days, no matter how many times Ja'far asked him he wouldn't budge. He was too stubborn and Ja'far didn’t understand why he wouldn’t let him know.

“Still a secret, Ja'far. You have to work harder than that if you want to find out before we’re there!’ he smiled and continued ahead, with Ja'far staring daggers into his back. As curious as Ja'far was, he decided that he should let Sinbad have this one. The reason why was quite simple, since Sinbad's smile revealed that he was quite excited about this surprise he had in mind. Ja'far didn’t want to be the one to ruin that beautiful look in his eyes and so, he chose to obey this time.

Eventually, Sinbad stopped before he turned to his best friend. They had climbed higher and higher up the hill and the wind had caught a hold of Sinbad’s purple locks. The other man tried his best to keep his hair out of his face and Ja'far was mesmerized by how the slightly comical situation could be as beautiful as it was. The purple locks danced in the fresh breeze despite Sinbad's disapproval and it caused Ja'far's heart to beat just a little bit faster. He smiled at his best friend and went up next to him to gaze at the world below the hill. However, he felt his breath get caught in his throat when he bore witness to the beautiful view of the ocean and harbour from the hill. They had been here before, briefly, but Ja’far hadn't been able to grasp quite how beautiful the view was from up there. Now that he was there to properly observe it, he found himself unable to look away.

“Sin.. This is..” his eyes were fixated on the birds that flew through the sky in a well-planned choreography. He brushed his bangs away from his eyes, as the wind had caught hold of them and forced them to block his view.

“I know..” Sinbad smiled and Ja'far briefly glanced to him. He was surprised to see that rather than looking at the view, Sinbad’s gaze was fixated on him.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” he looked into his amber eyes and watched him with curiosity.

“Hm? Ah, you look happy. Happiness looks beautiful on you.” Sinbad shifted his gaze from Ja'far's face to the ocean below them.

Ja'far felt his heart skip a beat and he was silent for a while as he watched the ocean, keeping the stubborn locks out of his face with his hand. Even if what Sinbad said was quite cheesy and a tad bit embarrassing, Ja’far couldn’t stop the smile that creeped on to his lips. “Is that so?”

In the corner of his eyes, he saw as Sinbad nodded and heard him hum in agreement. It truly made Ja'far happy.

After they had spent what they believed were hours on that hill, they had to retreat back to the inn once the dark had started to set. The mood was great and they joked and talked to each other as if the distance they had been aware of had all been a lie. Ja'far was very relaxed and happy to be able to spend time with his best friend.

They enjoyed dinner together that evening before Sinbad headed out to drink with the promise that he would be alright. Ja'far's mood had dropped severely after that but he couldn't stop Sinbad from having fun simply because he didn't want Sinbad to leave him. He had no right to do that.. probably and he sighed as he sat on the window sill to look out the window. He had to keep an eye on things, in case Sinbad returned. Once he eventually did, he had returned with a woman on his arm and he didn't stop by the inn.

Ja'far felt his heart drop at the sight. It felt like somebody had dropped a piece of glass from a tall building and watched as it shattered against the stone below. He knew that he had no right to feel that way, Sinbad was his own person and had the right to do whatever he wished to. It was not Ja'far's place to control him in order to prevent him from taking strangers to his bed. He knew that but he didn’t like it and he never had. He couldn’t help himself and stuck his head out the window, watching as Sinbad's frame disappeared further and further down the street.

“Sin!” there was no reaction from the other man and he took a deep breath. “Sin!”

This time it worked, because Sinbad stopped in his tracks with the woman on his arm and turned around. Eventually their eyes met and Sinbad gave him such a radiant smile as he waved to his best friend from the street below. The woman didn’t pay him much mind, rather she pulled gently at Sinbad's arm to urge him to continue on.

But Ja'far wasn't stupid, he knew that Sinbad’s beautiful smile was fake. Everything was all wrong, it wasn't the same one that filled his whole being with such warmth.

He wanted to tell him to stop what he was doing and return inside. He wanted to tell him that they should stay awake all night and talk about things they had seen as children and things they wanted to visit now as adults. He wanted to tell him that they should talk about where they wanted to go in Artemyra. But that was not what he told him and he felt his hands tremble in frustration as he spoke. “Be careful, Sin! And don't return too late!”

Sinbad waved at him and gave him such a kind smile. He was beautiful but the situation at hand broke Ja'far's heart. Because of that, he was only able to half-heartedly return the smile as he watched his best friend, the man that had so innocently stolen his heart, disappear down the street. When he could no longer spot him, Ja'far lowered his gaze before he then tightly shut his eyes. Behind his eyelids, tears burnt as if fire graciously licked his skin. It was painful and he thought of all the different ways to distract himself, for he didn’t wish to do anything stupid.

Sinbad was a kind person, Ja'far was more aware than anybody else of his strengths and flaws and he knew that Sinbad never meant to hurt him. But his heart cracked in his chest at every action that caused them to feel distanced. For a second or two, Ja'far genuinely wished that somebody would take his love for Sinbad away. Wrap it up in a box and store it safely within palace walls. But if that was to happen.. Who would stand by Sinbad and love him with all their heart, regardless of what foolish deed he might commit?

The negative thoughts had destructive results in the end. Though he had expected that, he was frustrated at the situation. Ja'far had found himself tasked with the removal of blood stains from the wooden floor after he had seen Sinbad leave. Guilt roamed in his mind, even more than prior to his actions and he tried to escape from his thoughts. Like blowing out a candle and allowing the world to be wrapped up in the comfort of the night. He truly wished it had been that easy. But unfortunately it was far from that easy and Ja'far knew as much, he had no choice but to accept things as they were. No matter how much he wished to close his eyes at times, in order to ignore the things that happened. He found himself disgusting, for weighing down Sinbad’s radiant energy with his tainted, torn aura.

As he was busy with criticizing himself in his own mind, he heard steps outside of the room. A drunken Sinbad, both on alcohol and the aftermath of his and that woman's mischievous acts, stumbled in through the door. He smiled widely at him but it didn’t quite reach those amber eyes of his. Ja'far watched him from his own bed, eyes observed the hickeys left on Sinbad's tanned skin.

“You're.. back late.” The tone in his voice was far sharper than Ja’far had originally intended. His heart ached in his chest and he felt such a despicable emotion as jealousy flow through his veins.

“Well, yeah! But it's no big deal, right?” Sinbad said with a smile as he flopped down on his own bed. “I know that it’s not very nice to just get up and leave you here but I really wanted to head out and drink and have some fun. And I know you don’t enjoy the night life.”

Ja'far watched him as he spoke and he furrowed his brow in both frustration and annoyance. “What do you even mean? You didn't even ask me if I wanted to come along. What if you had gotten hurt? Killed?”

“I can take care of myself, Ja’far. You don’t need to watch over me all the time.” Sinbad watched him and sighed. “I want you with me on my adventures. But you and I are two different people.. We need to live our lives.”

At that comment, Ja’far frowned in confusion before he felt himself start to get upset. He was very fragile this evening and every word was at a risk of damaging him, which greatly annoyed him. “What? So I don’t have a life because I am worried about you?”

“That's not what I said! Don’t turn my own words against me. What’s wrong, Ja'far?” Sinbad's previously annoyed expression changed and was replaced with a more concerned one. Ja'far found his own gaze to be fixated on Sinbad's eyes as those portrayed great worry directed at Ja'far himself.

Even if Ja'far knew that Sinbad only worried for him, it made him feel quite frustrated. He had wanted to speak with him about bad habits such as heading out late at night but his own insecurities was not something he wished to discuss. “What do you mean ‘what's wrong’? There’s nothing wrong with me!”

“Ja'far.. We're not getting anywhere with this argument.. Please talk to me?” Sinbad sat up and he watched him with such a concerned expression, it made Ja'far feel agitated. However, he knew that he was right and he couldn’t run away from that fact.

He tried to speak back but it felt as if all of the air in his lungs were knocked out of him. Arguments with his best friend had never been something he enjoyed and they left him feeling quite miserable. Ja'far took a deep breath and he sighed before his gaze moved to his own hands. “Sin.. You mean a lot to me. I would hate for you to get hurt when I'm not around. I'm here to protect you and..”

Sinbad quickly interrupted him as he rose to his feet. While it annoyed him that he wasn’t given the chance to fully speak what was on his mind, he decided to at least hear Sinbad out. “Listen, you’re not here to protect me.” He walked over to Ja’far's bed with determined steps and he sat down on it with a loud thud. His gaze sought Ja'far's out but the younger man wouldn’t meet his. “You're here to go on adventures with me as my best friend. Not as my body guard. Ja'far, please? You're more than a body guard. I know that you’re aware of that.”

Ja'far slowly lifted his gaze and met Sinbad's. When he did so, he realised how serious the expression that Sinbad wore was. The white haired man sighed and his best friend’s hands soon wrapped around his own, as if to comfort him. “I.. know. I'm sorry, Sin. I don't mean to make you feel suffocated. But I don’t want to lose you.”

Sinbad smiled fondly at him and Ja'far soon felt Sinbad’s arms wrapped around him in a gentle embrace and he was brought close to his best friend’s chest. Ja'far slowly melted into the warmth of the hug and he was surprised when Sinbad made them lay down on his bed. Nobody said anything after that for quite some time, Sinbad simply held him close to his chest and Ja'far rested in his embrace. He could hear Sinbad's heart beat at a steady pace in his chest and that gave him some comfort. It helped him relax and he closed his eyes for a moment to rest.

“You will be hungover tomorrow.” Ja’far eventually said and opened his eyes.

“Probably.” Sinbad said. When Ja'far gazed up at him, he saw that his eyes were closed and that a small smile had formed on his lips. It was a beautiful sight and while Ja’far found himself unable to tell whether the smile was genuine or not, he hoped it was.

“You're not moving back to your own bed, huh?” the tone Ja'far used indicated that it bothered him but if he was to be honest with himself, he didn’t want him to. Sinbad's warm embrace brought him such comfort and for once, he felt safe and content. He truly didn’t wish for it to end and he hoped that Sinbad would realise as much.

“No, this is far too comfortable.” Was the reply he received and it made him quite happy.

“I see.” Ja’far said and he too smiled. He made himself comfortable in Sinbad's arms and he closed his eyes. The scent of his best friend had a tendency to be quite pleasant to the point that he would describe it as intoxicating. While it had been tainted with the sharp scent of alcohol, Ja'far still found it comforting. It felt warm and before long, he could feel his conscious drift away.

Soon, they had both fallen asleep.


End file.
